This day last year, I unceremoniously dumped my boyfriend of 2 and a half years on Skype chat. I knew exactly what I didn't want that day. And I am happy to say, that a year on, I am on the right path to knowing what i do want. Because of course, one cannot exactly know what one wants, at any given period in life... I am extremely content at what my life is today.
But reflecting back on the last 12 months, I realised just how much i went through. Just how many expriences I have acquired, that have enriched me as a person. Most of which I would never have had, if I had stayed with him. I am much more than who I was last year. I was always sure of my decision, but I have never been surer than today. At the same time, I know that this 'spot' that I am in right now was not easy to find, nor will it be easy to stay in. But I have worked hard to come here, and I deserve it.
Now I feel like I'm finally ready to let go of that hate, and frustration I had with him, and be able to treat him as someone who affected my life greatly. Who loved me (maybe still loves me), who showed me what it was like to be loved, who made me realize that love must be shared equally. If the balance is tipped, one side will just come crashing down. He made me realize that before I can love someone else, I have to love myself. And before I love myself, I have to figure out who I am...
I have a good idea of who I am today. And I want him to know the ME of today, because I'm sure it will help him let go of that little girl he fell in love with 4 years ago and who broke his heart one year ago.
But reflecting back on the last 12 months, I realised just how much i went through. Just how many expriences I have acquired, that have enriched me as a person. Most of which I would never have had, if I had stayed with him. I am much more than who I was last year. I was always sure of my decision, but I have never been surer than today. At the same time, I know that this 'spot' that I am in right now was not easy to find, nor will it be easy to stay in. But I have worked hard to come here, and I deserve it.
Now I feel like I'm finally ready to let go of that hate, and frustration I had with him, and be able to treat him as someone who affected my life greatly. Who loved me (maybe still loves me), who showed me what it was like to be loved, who made me realize that love must be shared equally. If the balance is tipped, one side will just come crashing down. He made me realize that before I can love someone else, I have to love myself. And before I love myself, I have to figure out who I am...
I have a good idea of who I am today. And I want him to know the ME of today, because I'm sure it will help him let go of that little girl he fell in love with 4 years ago and who broke his heart one year ago.
A bientôt
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