Friday, January 23, 2009


Y'a plus rien a cacher.
Tout est exposé.
Fragile, permeable.
Me voila dans tout mon gloire,
Ou non.
Regards bien,
Ou non,


Margarita's on Thursdays is simply NOT enough!

I want Margarita's served by a Parrot in a shirt!

I want Blue Margarita's at the Margarita Blue Galadari!

I want Strawberry Margarita's at Darling made by Jaz!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Lucky for me!

It's been 2 months since i last smoked. It hasn't been very hard since I was never a chain smoker. But these days I've been feeling so blue that I'm craving for a cigarette and an espresso!

I miss Lucky Strike lights :(

I miss Benson lights too!

Sunday, January 11, 2009

New Cow

So this weekend i came across an interesting movie from back in 2001 called 'Someone like you'. It was a typical romantic comedy, except for a theory that the lead actress came up with. After being dumped for no reason by a guy with whom she shared a seemingly ideal love story, she started her quest to rationalize male behavior. This led her to find similarities between the mating behaviors of male cows (bulls) and human males.

The theory goes like this -
"New-Cow is short for New-Cow theory, which is short for Old-Cow-New-Cow theory, which, of course, is short for the sad, sorry truth that men leave women and never come back because all they really want is New Cow."

To explain further, according to this theory, male cows always want new females to mate with. They don't want to revisit where they've been before and are always searching for newer pastures to graze in. Just like the male cow, the human male too seems to want a new partner as soon as the old one becomes, well, old (not referring simply to age here)!

Now that the theoretical side of it is explained, i'd like to go into why this theory interests me.

First of all, I think that it's hard to actually come up with a plausible theory of human behavior (which the lead actress in the movie eventually found out). But there's nothing against theorizing. Because that's just what it is, a theory, not solid fact. It might not account for anything, but it's interesting do think about.

So i think that this theory can be used not only for males but for people in general. In relationships, it's easy to get used to someone. And then, this new cow comes along, all refreshing and different, and it's very easy to get attracted to. I think humans love diversity. We're built to evolve, to change, and because of that, we love to experience new things, or new cows...

This might also find a cause in the natural cycle of procreation. Men need to spread their seed, and women need to find better genes to mix with. So out with the old cow and in with the new. And this process will continue to repeat itself.

The New Cow theory, i think, goes hand in hand with the theory that humans are not monogamous creatures. Some statistic state that 50% of people in committed relationships, cheat on their partner. Needless to say, these statistics are not from the most secure of sources, but I think that they CAN be true. And the New Cow theory can explain how this can happen. After being in a committed relationship for many years, either one or both of the partners find the other old, and eventually a cow comes along who's new and exciting enough to be able to make one forget or just not care about commitment!

Regarding me, personally, I think that the New Cow theory might actually explain a lot of my own behavior. While in a relationship, i'm very much attracted to new cows, making me temporarily forget the old ones, and even going to the extent of not feeling guilty about my grazing. I also come up with theories to justify my behaviour, such as the Geographically Single theory when ones partner is not in the same country, and sometimes even when not in the same city.

Of course this post should be taken with a grain of salt, as it's more of a humorous anecdote with a dash of seriousness...

I don't know if there are faithful, monogamous cows, but i really hope that there are humans out there who are like this. Despite being a cynic, i still like to hope that someone out there can disprove me.

A bientôt

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Single: To be or not to be...

A pretty set of solar powered lights that look good together

It's been almost 10 months that i have been single. Well at least not in a long term relationship. To put it in a more coherent manner, it's been ten months since i broke up with my first real boyfriend.
After 2 and a half years of being in a serious relationship i feel like I haven't really felt single the last few months. Except of course for a few times when i've had a blues.
There have been so many things happening, so many changes, so many men that have crossed my path, that i haven't felt like i really needed to be in a relationship. Even when i did have a chance at one, it didn't work out for absolutely no explainable reason...
I can't deny that it wasn't nice being in a couple. Being a set, an awesome twosome! It felt secure, i had someone i could tell everything to, someone to listen to my little quirky remarks about my day, someone to console me in my hypochondriac moments, someone to tell everything to (almost everything).
But then again, when i really think about it, he was more of a cross between a parent and best friend for me. Because i was far from home, with my best friend living in a different country, albeit not too far away. But now, i'm back at home. My mum is there to fuss over me, my best friend is still in a different country, now even further than before but she's still there for me to tell things to... So he's not really missed.
What i do miss is the physical side of being in a relationship. The hugs, the cuddling, the holding hands, looking into eyes.. Yet, being in a long distance relationship, i wasn't really getting much of that.
So in the end, i really don't feel like i'm missing something. Apparently if a few months i'll feel different. A very close friend of mine who has been single for more than a year tells me that she feels lonely, that she wants something to look forward to, someone to hold her in that special way, to be loved..
I of course tried to pacify her saying solitude is a given for us human beings, and to not look for love, and that it'll find u, the usual clichés stuff...
But it got me thinking. Do i or do i not want to be single?
My question was asnwered a few minutes after my conversation with my friend. A girl from class started telling me about her relationship with her bf, and WOW, i think her relationship would come a close second in the 'messed up relationship' scale!
All throught her banter, i felt myself thanking a 'higher power' for being single! I didn't want complications in my life. My mess just ended and i did NOT want to get in another one!
The next day I found an article about a girl who makes a pact to be single for a year! I'd like to do this, but i wonder if being single allows for random hooks ups, because i sincerely hope that a year of singleness does not equate to a year of abstinence!!!
Whatever it means, i think that i'll try being single for about 6 months. Things are so simple when you're single. No need to worry about what another person thinks. Love, i get enough of from my family; sex, I can find it when i need it; company, friends do the trick!

So here's to a single first half of 2009 - Tchin tchin!!

A bientôt

Monday, January 5, 2009

J'ai fais Table Rase!

'Faire table rase' is a french expression meaning have a clean plate, start at zero... And this is exactly what i feel like doing!

Out goes the black background and sombre colour scheme of my blog, and in comes the multicolour texts, beautiful beach header (that i captured myself) and lots of happy and positive blogs to make the blog even more colourful!

First of all i'd like to share my 3 new years resolutions. I'm not one who has a track record of keeping resolutions but these seem to be very achievable and i hope that i'd be able to see them through.

1. Drive to work alone by the end of the month (of January)
2. Exercise 15 mins daily (with the option of increasing the duration)
3. Let people talk to me

Despite how hard it is to get oneself motivated to work out, i think that it's my last resolution that will be the hardest to stick to.

The reason behind this particular resolution is my realisation of the fortress that i have built around myself. Slowly, through the years, and the bad experiences that i have had with other people, brick by brick i had created a very solid wall around myself, with a few entrances for a handful of people who, after having won the right to enter, have had access to me completely.

But everyone else, i block out. I seem very social, and open and out-going to the outside world. Little do they know that what they see is only a tip of the iceberg, and in some cases, a chunk of plastic that i use to comouflage the real one!

Therefore my resolution is to let people talk to me, not just the ones I want to talk to but also the ones who want to talk to me!

To let people into my world, at least let them have a little peek into it..

It feels so easy to close up.. I have been closed up for so long, even to people i thought i was opening up to. Like my ex, who saw only what he wanted to see, and who i showed only that...

I don't think this particular trait of mine is something that i singlehandedly developed. I think that 'others' had a hand in the building of the fortress. I am starting to feel lonely in this world that i've created for myself. Especially as the rare ones who hold a key into it, are so very far away...

The bane of humanity is that we are social animals, we crave for others of our own kind. Yet ironically, we are isolated in our thoughts... Our coporeal selves are thrown into a crowd whereas our mental selves are always alone.. It's hard to constantly be alone in a crowd, yet this is what every single human being is cursed to live through for their short life spans.

And as Thomas Wolfe put it "Loneliness is and always has been the central and inevitable experience of every man".

A bientôt