Sunday, January 11, 2009

New Cow

So this weekend i came across an interesting movie from back in 2001 called 'Someone like you'. It was a typical romantic comedy, except for a theory that the lead actress came up with. After being dumped for no reason by a guy with whom she shared a seemingly ideal love story, she started her quest to rationalize male behavior. This led her to find similarities between the mating behaviors of male cows (bulls) and human males.

The theory goes like this -
"New-Cow is short for New-Cow theory, which is short for Old-Cow-New-Cow theory, which, of course, is short for the sad, sorry truth that men leave women and never come back because all they really want is New Cow."

To explain further, according to this theory, male cows always want new females to mate with. They don't want to revisit where they've been before and are always searching for newer pastures to graze in. Just like the male cow, the human male too seems to want a new partner as soon as the old one becomes, well, old (not referring simply to age here)!

Now that the theoretical side of it is explained, i'd like to go into why this theory interests me.

First of all, I think that it's hard to actually come up with a plausible theory of human behavior (which the lead actress in the movie eventually found out). But there's nothing against theorizing. Because that's just what it is, a theory, not solid fact. It might not account for anything, but it's interesting do think about.

So i think that this theory can be used not only for males but for people in general. In relationships, it's easy to get used to someone. And then, this new cow comes along, all refreshing and different, and it's very easy to get attracted to. I think humans love diversity. We're built to evolve, to change, and because of that, we love to experience new things, or new cows...

This might also find a cause in the natural cycle of procreation. Men need to spread their seed, and women need to find better genes to mix with. So out with the old cow and in with the new. And this process will continue to repeat itself.

The New Cow theory, i think, goes hand in hand with the theory that humans are not monogamous creatures. Some statistic state that 50% of people in committed relationships, cheat on their partner. Needless to say, these statistics are not from the most secure of sources, but I think that they CAN be true. And the New Cow theory can explain how this can happen. After being in a committed relationship for many years, either one or both of the partners find the other old, and eventually a cow comes along who's new and exciting enough to be able to make one forget or just not care about commitment!

Regarding me, personally, I think that the New Cow theory might actually explain a lot of my own behavior. While in a relationship, i'm very much attracted to new cows, making me temporarily forget the old ones, and even going to the extent of not feeling guilty about my grazing. I also come up with theories to justify my behaviour, such as the Geographically Single theory when ones partner is not in the same country, and sometimes even when not in the same city.

Of course this post should be taken with a grain of salt, as it's more of a humorous anecdote with a dash of seriousness...

I don't know if there are faithful, monogamous cows, but i really hope that there are humans out there who are like this. Despite being a cynic, i still like to hope that someone out there can disprove me.

A bientôt

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